mets musings

first post :

There are squillions of cancer blogs out there and I feel a bit unwilling to add to them but I need somewhere to write stuff that often floats around in my head and that people won't feel obliged to read because it's on my Facebook page.
So...
a brief update about me. 
I am an illustrator,that's the main thing about me- have been one since I left art school a long time ago. Never really thought about being anything else (well,a medical artist at one point,though am horribly squeamish and looking at pathology books in Foyles made me feel very queasy)
I'm also a wife and a mother of one, I have a cat and long desperately for a dog.

Four years ago I had breast cancer - a relatively small thing with an excellent prognosis. One year ago I found out that it had spread and was now in residence in both lungs. I wouldn't have known except for a sudden horrible pain in my chest which sent me to see my doctor and set me on the path to discovering I now had secondary breast cancer. This is also known as metastatic breast cancer. There is no cure but it can be managed so it doesn't mean you're about to kark it, at least not for a few years. 
I'm not afraid of the karking it bit but the lonely path I'm on is weird and strange and half the time I can't quite believe I'm on it.

So that's it really - I'm fitting all my usual bits of life into this new way of living and have got through 1 year of it. I'm very much still here and cramming in as much work as I can just in case - besides which I hate to be idle.

I'll just occasionally witter on for a bit about stuff that occurs to me in the hope that writing something down will be helpful and save those who look after me from having to listen to me asking whether they're quite sure that I really have this thing. It's in my nature to question and investigate but usually I overthink things and end up very muddled.
Righto, that'll do for now. I'm off to my beloved Waitrose to find some lunch,then to the dentist to get my poor broken tooth seen to and if not too numb after that I'm off to swim. I shall report back.